Kokuhaku
by Tomyo Torou
Summary: I was hurt, it was all his fault... for not taking me seriously! A one-shoot HeiShin... YAOI! Kokuhaku means Confession


I disclaim Detective Conan... I always do (laugh)

Authors note: actually... this story is to Kudocchi.. and to all fans of HeiShin ^_^

Love forever = Tantei Ai! = Yaoi X3

Anyways... I wrote this on like... hm, I used precisely 5 or 6 hours on this one... oh well, that's how it come when it turnes into 7 pages (sigh)

It might be a little long, but since it's a Heiji pov, I guess he's thinking a lot :D

A~nd it's a one-shoot~

Please do enjoy though~

Kokuhaku.

I walked up the stair towards the door I've been coming to a lot lately, behind me, my childhood friend Kazuha followed.

I knocked on the door and it was soon opened by a girl I knew all to well "yo Nee-chan..." I said, grinning as I always would.

Ran smiled back to me and showed us in, Kogoro, her father was where I suspected he would be, plastered to that small television, probably some Okino Yoko show.

Then Ran and Kazuha hugged, like the typical girl-manner, I sighted _**"girls!"**_ then I turned away, looking around, trying to find the reason for my visit, Kazuha just wanted to meet Ran after all.

"Nee-chan... wher's Ku.. Ko, Conan-kun?" I asked, almost forgetting not to call that brat Kudou anymore.

Ran turned to me and shook her head, while a smile played on her face "he is out with his friends, why?" I shrugged my shoulders "nothin' just wondered!" I said as I turned away, looking at a small paper I had scribbled on earlier "'k... I've got some stuff to do.. see ya later!" then I walked off.

X3 X3 X3

I walked down the street and ended up at the place I knew he would be, one phone to that scientist-girl and I knew he was there.

I tried the door and was slightly surprised when the door wasn't locked _**"that's unusual... Kudou never lets the door stan' open.."**_ I knew I panicked, but I didn't want him to be in any trouble, no him of all people.

Closing the door behind me, I walked into the huge hall, I toed off my shoes and almost jumped around to find the boy.

As I walked into the library, wich I suspected him to be in, I found a new couch, on it, that brat was sleeping, I sighted and sat down slowly and scooped him into my arms.

No one was to know about my feelings, these where the only thing I would never be honest about, I didn't want anyone to look down at me, since it was expected of me to marry Kazuha once in the future, but still... I couldn't deny my own feelings, even if they weren't all to straight.

The boy groaned quietly in his sleep and mumbled, words I knew, those lips forming into the one and only love of his.

I bit my lower lip, noticing that is was shaking... damn, I'm not the one to feel so hurt over something, damnit!

Still, I couldn't stop, no, the tears wouldn't and it was all his fault.

I pushed him gently off and stood up, one look at the clock and I knew I had to get back to Kazuha soon, it was only a small visit this time... the last visit, I would never come back, I knew it would somehow hurt the boy, but I didn't care.. I needed some time alone and the only place for that was in my own room, a sight escaped my mouth long before I realised it.

In my whole life, I had only committed one or two taboo's and this was one of them.

I had fallen in love with another boy, then I had done the worst and that was all the honest part of me's fault, I had confessed... it was a do or do not, there is no try, but it hurt me of the way he brushed it off.

"_I think your a little confused Hattori, I've known you for a while now and I can see that look you give Kazuha, it's the same as with me and Ran, it's love Hattori, not this!"_

The words struck deep inside me, knowing the tears wouldn't stop now, knowing that I would give up everything so that I could forget about this and that, even those stupid feelings.

As I knew it was more to see in this feelings, but he still loved her, every inch of his body told me that, I would have seen it if he had lied, I guess that comes with me being overall to honest.

But that was the bad point, even if I was honest with the people around me, I still wasn't honest with myself and that had cut down my dreams and hopes.

"Hattori?" a soprano voice caught my attention and I froze, not turning around, I forced my voice to sound calm and composed.

"Yeah?" I asked "what are you doing here... you came on a visit again?" Conan's voice made me flinch "y-yeah... Kazuha wanted to visit Nee-chan" still facing the door, I made out how nice the carving on it was, small arrows in each corner and even the handle on the door, it carved into bird, probably a swan, after all, it had a long neck.

"I guess... then why are you here?" Conan asked, he voice sounded closer, was he closing the distance between us?

"I just came in to see if ya wer' here, I was after all passin' by!" I tried to say, my voice sounded more broken than I had ever heard it.

Conan must have noticed to because he came up to me, but then again, he was behind me "Hattori... are you okay?" he asked, I nodded fast "y-yeah... but since ya wher' 'k, I'm goin' to leave, I've got to get the stuff I need!" I excused myself and opened the door, not looking at the boy for one second.

Conan didn't speak after that, just followed me out to the front door, I sat down on the floor and started to open my shoes, in wich I had forgotten to untie when I came in.

Suddenly a hand landed on my shoulder, a small hand that is, my body jumped slightly when it landed, since that was a place where the t-shirt I wore didn't cover.

"Hattori... when will you come to visit again, it's been long since we've solved crimes together?" there was something under his voice, but I didn't dare to turn around "I don't know... I've got exams soon an' Kazuha wanted me to come with'er an' her family on a vacation!" it wasn't all the truth, but it wasn't a lie either.

"Okay..." Conan simply said, as if he didn't really care, but he voice told me the opposite "Kudou... I know I did somethin' stupid, but ya know I had to get it out... an'..." I fell silent, my voice seemed to have gone off somewhere it wanted to relax.

The hand disappeared and I wondered a second if Conan was going to hit me, but he didn't, but to my surprise, he came up to my side and forced me to face him, I turned my face away, hiding from his not-child eyes.

"Hattori, look at me!" he said, his voice was much darker than he would sound.

I was now sure, there was three different voices of Conan, the child-voice, the detective-voice, in wich sounded more like the real him and the scary, threatening one, wich he used right now.

But I didn't turn, hiding my face under my bangs of hair... yay for dark brown bangs.

"Hattori!" Conan almost growled and put his hands on my face, I yelped as he forced me to turn back to him.

Then Conan let go "Hattori.." he whispered, I sighted "I'll see ya later then Kudou" I got into my shoes and stood up, but the boy didn't seem to want their meeting to end just yet, he ran over and locked the door, standing in front of it as if trying to hold me here forever "oi Kudou... now ye'r childish, open up already!" I said, but he just shook his head "no!"

"Kudou!" I growled and lifted the boy up with one hand, then I reached to unlock the door, but Conan's face caught my sight, he was blushing, looking more cute than ever in fact.

"Don't just go aroun' fuckin' with me Kudou!" I said, trying to ignore the boy, who fought to get out of my grip, but he didn't seem to mind it as long as the door was locked "Kudou?" I stopped and watched the boy blush more, reaching his hands out to grab onto me it seemed.

His hands made contact with my neck and I felt heat rise in my face, damn those who made up the blush!!

Conan managed to get out of my grip as I relaxed by his touch, but he didn't seem to want to get down, he flung his arms around my neck and hung there, his short feet around my waist, I looked down and right into his eyes, I felt even more hot now and the fact that the one I loved was hanging onto me like a monkey didn't seem to help it go away.

"Kudou, get down, I'm not a tree!" I complained, but the boy snorted and lifted himself up somehow, I blinked as a pair of lips planted on mine, as of that, my brain officially shut down right then and there.

As Conan finally backed off, he was blushing, blushing hard.

I blinked even more and then it struck me "wait Kudou, are ya.." I wasn't able to finish the sentence as Conan pushed one of his small hands up and covered my mouth "shut up Hattori..." I raised an eyebrow of that, but still kept my mouth shut.

"I know that I hurt you... I could see it all the times we met, after that day... w-when y-you con... er confessed.." he blushed vividly and I felt a triumphant grin take over on my face "I could see that you were serious, you didn't smile, nor your eyes showed any kind of playfulness, in wich you would do when you where joking around... I.. back then I forced myself to believe you where just playing a prank, but your face told me that I had done the wrong..."

I sighted and pulled his hand away, while I also put a hand around his waist to hold him up "Kudou... it's 'k... already.. but I've got to ask, Nee-chan told me that ya had been goin' out a lot lately, did ya go here the whole time?" I asked and got the reaction I almost waited for.

"Is it that obvious... well shit... of course it is!" a blush placed itself on Conan's face and I grinned, this boy was absolutely cute, harsh, but cute!

Even before I had realised what I had done, I found out that nibbling on his cheeks earned me a shiver and a small moan from him.

"Why're ya here then Kudou?" I asked between nibbling on his cheeks and his earlobe, wich was even more sensitive than his cheeks.

I earned a moan and then he folded both hands around my neck again "I need to get used to this house... to live alone again.." he whispered, I stopped, lifted my head up as I stared into this not-child's blue eyes.

"What do ya mean?" I asked, then boys smiled, then he pulled up something from his pocket, it was a small bottle in fact.

I blinked, then I obviously gawked "Kudou... izzat?" Conan nodded "I've already called my parents... they're coming later today, Edogawa Conan is going back to America and Kudou Shinichi will return in a few days.."

I nodded and gave him a quick peck "so what 'bout those crows?" I asked, he looked up at me, a blush that had been played quite lustful over his face had now disappeared and he was overall very pale.

"I haven't thought much about it... but I have talked to Jodie... you know, that English teacher of mine!"I nodded, I remember her very well, that woman was pretty, strong and... bad in Japanese, didn't even know what Osaka-ben was!

"Hm... so ye'll be under watch then?" I said after he had sighted and somehow crawled into a lying position in my arms "yup... then of course Haibara too... but I think that if we are a little more... um outstanding, then they might actually take action and that is what we want!" he said, I smiled and nuzzled the boy into a hug "so ya 're coming back for me then?" ops, spoke to soon, he gave me a quick hit in the head, but he was blushing madly, so speaking of the negative would just hit right back at him right now.

X3 X3 X3

"Kudou.. I am glad ya 'now" I said, Shinichi looked up from his book, a slight blush took place on his face and I grinned, cupping his jaw into my hand as I kissed him, I earned a muted moan and a blush of that "H-Hattori... don't, we have to.." I smirked manically "yeah yeah, takin'em down tomorrow ain't we!?" I said, he looked at me and smiled, the former eight years old boy, now eighteen years old teen looked absolutely devine, cute and.. hehe.. sexy!

Dragging the teen into a heated kiss, earning one back too, I was even more happier with this than looking over at Kazuha and her boyfriend all the time.

It had been a week since Kudou Shinichi had come back, a day later I told her about my feelings for him, she didn't beat me up, nor did she cry heartbroken, it shocked me to the degree that she actually called my dad, after that my parents arrived, I yelled at Kazuha for two hours straight after that, it was total humiliation.

It seemed Kazuha had fallen in love with some guy from another school, they had then gotten together a day after I told her, though that stupid dad of mine gave me a weird look each time I came into his meeting, but I didn't really care... or well, I did but, then I'm back to today, I finally managed to get my ass up and move into Kudou's mansion, not that he protested, Ran had looked rather frustrated, probably because she still loved him, I got a real laugh when he managed to tell about us earlier today, she hadn't hit him, but she looked dangerous so to speak, then she had stomped out of the house, slamming the door after her.

But I was still happy!

"_Y-you know, Heiji... I guess, I d-do love you too..."_

A confession?... nope, not fully, but I was soo close, but then Haiba came in with those other damn kids, I gave that ya-just-ruined-the-confession-look, she just chuckled and dragged the kids out to play or something, Shinichi laughed too, motsly when that girl, Ayumi wanted his autograph and the other two boys looked ready to kill.

"Shin-chan... ya where talkin'?!" I purred as I hugged the teen, he snorted and turned away, I pouted, then slipped my hands lower to a special and most sensitive place, Shinichi jumped and soon a moan escaped him "Shinichi... what did ya want to say?" I asked, then teen still didn't turn, but he was at least trying to say something "Hattori..." "Heiji" I cut him off _"Heiji.. damnit.... okay then... I love you Heiji, fine?!"_ he said.

I smiled _"I love ya to Shinichi!" _that was a confession after all!

=_=

OWARII~

How was it... I guess it was a long BORING end, but I really wanted a good confession, even though Heiji had to lure it out of Shinichi X3

Please read AND review though... cuz I need all the help and learning I can get (I learn and live of comments ya know)

So know I'm going all Kampaii~ and also try to get rid of this stupid cold I have!!!


End file.
